Father’s Day can evoke a wide range of emotions. For some, it’s a joyful celebration. For others, it’s a day of grief, awkwardness, or complicated reflection; recognize that this day may feel
heavy for those facing a “first” — the first Father’s Day after the loss of a father, as a new
father, or as part of a recently restructured family.
Here are a few perspectives on Father’s Day and mental health, along with strategies for managing emotional complexity with self-compassion and intention.
1. The First Father’s Day Without Your Dad
Grieving the loss of a father can make Father’s Day feel like an emotional minefield. Whether your relationship was close, strained, or somewhere in between, the absence is often felt deeply.
Coping Strategies:
Allow space for grief: You don’t need to put on a brave face. Let yourself cry, reminisce, or simply feel numb—all are valid.
Create a ritual: Light a candle, visit a meaningful place, or write a letter to your father. Rituals can offer a sense of connection.
Connect with others: Whether it’s family, friends, or a therapist, talking about your loss can be grounding and healing.
2. The First Father’s Day as a New Dad
Becoming a father is a major life shift—equal parts exciting and overwhelming. This day might feel like a milestone, or it might pass by quietly if your baby isn’t old enough to understand it yet.
Coping Strategies:
Embrace imperfection: There’s no “perfect” standard. Focus on showing up with love and presence, not performance.
Celebrate small wins: Changing diapers at 3 a.m. counts. So does keeping your child alive and loved.
Check in with yourself: New fatherhood can be isolating. Therapy can provide space to explore the identity shift and stress that may come with it.
3. The First Father’s Day After a Family Restructuring
Divorce, separation, or co-parenting transitions can bring emotional weight to Father’s Day. It may feel different, awkward, or even painful if you’re navigating shared custody or disrupted traditions.
Coping Strategies:
Focus on presence over perfection: If you’re with your child, be fully there. If you’re not, create a plan to connect meaningfully (call, video message, shared activity later).
Validate your feelings: Guilt, sadness, or even relief are common and do not make you a bad parent.
Redefine traditions: It’s okay to create new rituals that work for your current reality.
A Gentle Reminder:
There’s no single “right” way to feel on Father’s Day. What matters most is giving yourself permission to feel whatever comes up, without judgment.
Whether you’re grieving, adjusting, or beginning, your emotions are valid. And if this time of
year feels heavier than expected, therapy can offer support and perspective.
Call to Action:
If Father’s Day is bringing up unexpected emotions, you don’t have to navigate them alone.
Reach out to a Skylark Behavioral Health therapist today to talk it through—we’re here to
support you in every chapter of your story.
Jordan Hammes, MA, LPC